I’ll make you as red

As the blushing fruits of a

Summer pudding,

Sweet berry bonanza,

A seasonal answer,

And cure for your wintery heart.

 

Oh!

I’ll make you as orange

As a wee dram of

Glenmorangie,

Oh so boozy woozy,

My marmalade jacuzzi,

Still turning my mind to jam.

 

Oh yes!

I’ll make you as yellow

As the rubber ducky in my

Bath, ye

Sexy soapsuds-surfer,

Wave-crashing big bertha,

How’s it bedtime already?

 

Yes! Yes!

I’ll make you as green

As the sour apples in my

Pocket,

Hard-boiled satisfaction,

Sharp-witted distraction,

And caustic cause for content.

 

Oh!!

I’ll make you as black

As my mid-morning

Coffee,

Eager-eyed eight ball,

That jet-threaded waterfall,

And saviour of my weary mind.

 

But no!

I’ll make you as white

As the snow in my

Window,

This frosty reception,

Nowt more than deception,

When your kisses still give me warmth.

 

And since I know that these colours

Are better suited to you,

I promise, my love,

Never to make you feel blue.