Oh, pretty privateer

Pretty please won’t you

Plunder me for all the

Pathetic pennies I am

Worth,

Worthy wanderer of the

Seven seas, sail aside my silly

Ship.

 

I’m the Royal Navy, naïve,

You’re out to get me,

Maritime Marauder,

Make me your

Cannon fodder, plonker and

Plank

Come walk all over me.

 

And free me from this fruitless

Vessel,

Bloody booty-full

Freebooter, nightmare and

Mariner.

 

Argh!

Shiver me timbers!

Tickle me pink!

Perky pirate,

Please let me sink!